The Testing of a Wizard - Viktor Gitin

class="p1">CANNIBAL - For sure! It’s a known well fact that when people don’t want to share their food or money, they usually give advice instead.

GELO – No, truthfully, I really want to help you, let me try to cure you from cannibalism. Although I’m not a real Wizard yet, I do know some spells. They can cure people from many different diseases, maybe they can help you.

CANNIBAL – What?! Do you expect me to become an ordinary man?!

GELO – Is that a bad thing?

CANNIBAL – Are you having a laugh! If I lived like ordinary man, I would die not seeing old age. Nowadays cannibalism is not a sickness, it’s my nature. It’s the way of surviving in this cruel and cynical world. If I don’t eat somebody, then someone will eat me. I'll cease to be myself. You’re offering me to betray myself! It’s bad enough when others betray you. Nowadays it happens everywhere. But it’s even worse when you betray yourself. You look like a decent young man! How can you suggest such a thing to a poor, lonely Cannibal? You should be ashamed?!

GELO – But I want to help you. I just want to help all the people in the world…

CANNIBAL – If you really want to make all people happy, then make me happy too. For the sake of it I would even let you go to get this MIRACLE. (Sadly, looks to the side) And stay hungry for yet another day! …

GELO – But what do you need to be happy?

CANNIBAL – (Excitedly) It’s very simple. Make sure I have plenty to eat every day, plenty of young and fresh humans.

GELO – (Bewildered) But then all those innocent people will be unhappy!

CANNIBAL – So what? Why should my head hurt because of others? Since their heads don’t hurt because of me!

GELO – No you don’t understand anything. I have to make everybody happy.

CANNIBAL – That means you’re a liar. It is impossible to make everybody happy! How can a man be happy knowing that his next-door neighbour is richer than him? How can a man be joyful knowing that his friend’s wife is better than his own? What feelings must a woman experience knowing that her rival has more expensive jewelry and a more extravagant outfit than her?

GELO – You’re talking about envy. But there are other feelings like kindness, generosity, and unselfishness …

CANNIBAL – I’m talking about, that there will never be enough gold and wealth for everyone in the world. And there will always be those who get less than others. I’m talking about, that not everyone will have beautiful and kind wives. I’m talking about, the demands and requests of women which are endless, but the ability of men to satisfy those demands and requests are limited. I’m talking about, that in life one’s happiness is often built upon another’s unhappiness. I’m talking about, that only one of us can be happy. Either I will be happy, if I eat you or you will be happy if I remain hungry!

Cannibal tries to attack Gelo. Gelo jumps out the way and is quick enough to execute a magic spell.

GELO – Shumbo, Tumbo, Bumbo! Freeze!

Cannibal stops and freezes. Gelo breathes a sigh of relief and looks with sympathy at Cannibal.

GELO – I’m sorry I had to cast a spell on you. I didn’t want to; you brought it upon yourself… But you’re probably right about something. Perhaps you cannot make everybody happy. On my journey I will think about this. But now I have to go and search for the MIRACLE …

CANNIBAL – (Anguishly moans) M-M-M-M …

GELO – Don’t worry, the spell won’t last forever. The spell will wear off when you encounter human kindness. Until then have a think about your unrighteous thoughts and wrong doings. Farewell.

There is a sound of a gong.

Music plays. Blackout.

Cannibals room is the same as it was when Gelo left. Cannibal remains in his position.

Lizy comes in. Walks over to the hourglass and turns it upside down. Some time has passed since Gelo left. She looks around the room and stumbles upon a frozen Cannibal. She touches him with curiosity, and he comes to life. Lizy, who is scared, jumps back.

CANNIBAL – B-r-r-r-r! How awful it is to be under a spell.

LIZY – Excuse me, but I didn’t mean you any harm.

CANNIBAL – You didn’t harm me. By touching me you have broken the spell. I’ve been standing here for a few days, like a stone. All because of my kind and trusting nature.

LIZY – Who upset you?

CANNIBAL – That’s putting it lightly! I’ve been insulted to the core of my soul. There is so much hypocrisy and lies in the world, even I can’t deceive people anymore. Nobody trusts each other anymore. You probably want to deceive me too?

LIZY – Of course not! I never think that way about people.

CANNIBAL – Yeah, I don’t like thinking too much either. One shouldn’t allow himself to be introspective for too long, because one could lose himself in a labyrinth of thoughts… And if you track back, you’ll find that you have lost something valuable, because we are surrounded by thieves and scoundrels. (Walks around Lizy and looks at her strangely) Nowadays it is hard to live for an honest man, like me.

LIZY – Why are you looking at me as if I was naked?!

CANNIBAL – Because I’m hungry!

LIZY – I have some leftovers in my knapsack. (Offering it) Please have some.

CANNIBAL – What’s this filth you’re offering me? And so little of it! If this is food, then I’m a fool!

LIZY – It’s food! Of course, it’s food.

CANNIBAL – Hmm! Let’s not argue.

LIZY – Why are you looking at me so strangely